George Carlin Quotes

Thirteen George Carlin Quotes

01. Honesty may be the best policy, but it’s important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.
02. I don’t have hobbies; hobbies cost money. Interests are quite free.
03. When someone asks you, A penny for your thoughts, and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?
04. Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
05. It’s never just a game when you’re winning.
06. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn’t it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted?
07. I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
08. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
09. When cheese gets it’s picture taken, what does it say?
10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
11. Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.
12. Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.
13. Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

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