Signs you can tell it will be a rough day ahead…

You wake up face down on the pavement.

You put your bra on backward and it fits better.

You call Suicide Prevention and they put you on hold.

You see a “60 Minutes” news team waiting in your office.

Your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.

You want to put on the clothes you wore home from the party last night, and there aren’t any.

You turn on the news and they’re showing emergency routes out of the city.

Your twin sister forgot your birthday.

You wake up and discover your waterbed broke and then realize that you don’t have a waterbed.

Your car horn goes off accidentally and remains stuck as you follow a group of Hell’s Angels on the interstate.

Your wife wakes up feeling amorous and you have a headache.

Your boss tells you not to bother to take off your coat.

The bird singing outside your window is a buzzard.

You wake up and your braces are locked together.

You walk to work and find your dress is stuck in the back of your pantyhose.

Your blind date turns out to be your ex-wife.

Your income tax check bounces.

You put both contacts lenses in the same eye.

Your wife says, “Good morning, Bill,” and your name is George.

You send this to all your lists and put the wrong disclaimers on it!

Fun Monday: Christmas Carols

Mamalang is hosting Fun Monday this week. Her instructions are: “It’s the Christmas season, and I want you to tell us what are your three favorite Christmas Carols and a picture of your favorite Christmas “thing”. It could be a Christmas tree, or your mantle, or a church, you in a Santa hat.”

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My three most favorite Christmas Carols are, “The Little Drummer Boy”, “Christmas Eve in Sarajevo” and “Wizards in Winter”. Two of those are performed by the Trans Siberian Orchestra. I love the music they produce. It can put nearly anyone in the Christmas spirit. I would so love to see them live!

Neighbors From Hell

I found a new Monday Meme titled “Fun Monday“. Yes, I am playing along a day late but that is ok 🙂 .

This meme is hosted by “Beyond My Slab” and this is this week’s theme…”Welcome. Here’s where you sign up for the December 1st version of Fun Monday. Here goes: Tell us about your all-time worst Neighbors from Hell. You know, the family of Irish clog dancers who once lived in the flat/apartment above you? Mrs. Nextdoor and her banshee-like multiple orgasms? Mr. and Mrs. Hard-of-Hearing with their television on full blast? The guys across the street who set off 4th of July fireworks starting in March and didn’t stop until the first real snowfall?”

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Growing up, we had neighbors that were rather mean. Our dogs like to chase cars and the neighbors like to tease the dogs and tried many times to run over our dogs. I know Dad asked them several times to leave the dogs alone but they never listened.